On a Personal Note: to my future daughter

wrote this right after finding out we were having a girl.  it's easy now that she's here to just try to care for her in my own strength and not keep praying for her.  Lord, teach me to pray.

To my daughter:
I thought you were a girl from the start-- you made me very sick and extremely emotional and somehow I just knew.  When I was pregnant with your brother I didn't know what to think.  We were shocked and overwhelmed.  But this time was so different.  We waited for you and prayed for you to be added to our family and finding out you were on the way was thrilling.  And the anticipation of meeting you is about killing me!  I can't wait.

I am beginning to pray specifically for you and the kind of woman you will become.  It's not easy to be a woman in this world.  It's not easy to be in this world in general but I hope you know from an early age the immeasurable goodness of God.  I hope we can explain to you that we have nothing without him and we have all that we need and immeasurably more with him.  I hope our love for you is a hint of how God delights in you and rejoices over you.  I pray that you run to him for grace and walk closely by his side all of your days.  And I pray that you believe deeply in his promises and trust and delight in him.

I hope you are a woman who is much more concerned with her heart than with her appearance.  I pray that you feel free from all of the things that trap women and all of the lies that are thrown at you.  I pray that you wouldn't even trust your own heart which Scripture tells us is "deceitful- who can know it?" but instead you would deeply trust in Jesus.  That you would trust him with your life, all of the details, and live boldly and audaciously for the sake of others knowing him as well.

I pray that you hold out for a man like your Dad, one who seeks to honor and understand you and partner with you in every way.

I pray that you and Graham are buddies and that you learn how to consider others better than yourself through having to share and reconcile conflict with him.

I pray that I, as your extremely flawed mom, show you what grace means and fill your mind with truth at every opportunity.  I hope you can forgive the mistakes that I will make and that even those will make you reach out for God.

I'm very excited to stick bows on your head and chit chat with you in the middle of the night those first few months and I can't wait to discover your personality.  You are a gift, an inheritance from the Lord, and I am so grateful for the privilege to parent you.

I love you baby girl.

Mommy