Tuesday, February 28, 2012

On a Personal Note: my plan

So, my two worst fears in life are vomit and bumpy plane rides. At the beginning of our flight from Atlanta to LAX, my sweet Graham decided to get sick all over me. After 45 minutes of attempting to clean it up, I resigned myself to smelling horrible for the rest of the 4 hour flight. Just picture this: I had to take off some of my clothing so I looked quite sketchy; I was freezing because I was soaked; people all around us were complaining to each other and to the flight attendants about the smell...

I looked at Dave right after it happened (thinking we were in for a week of the stomach bug on our vacation) and I just cried saying, "why would Jesus let this happen when he knows it's my worst fear." My wise husband said, "Why don't you ask him?"

So I did. For three hours.

I had just read an article earlier that day about the fact that we say we love that God is in control, until his plan is different than ours. I realized in the course of those three hours that I had decided exactly what our family "needed" on that vacation. And I was not okay with God having a different idea.

Graham never got sick again and none of us did either. But even better than that, I was able to have less of an agenda that whole week which was incredibly freeing. God had been so loving by allowing that to happen so that I would see the truth of how much I seek my own pleasure and plans and how much God cares more about me than I even care about myself.
This is an ongoing process in my life and I'm just grateful God isn't leaving me how I am but is gently revealing my sin and changing me.
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3 comments:

  1. Love this post.. I'm sorry people complained.. It must have made you feel even worse than you already did.. Sometimes I just wish people could be understanding and kind....Im also glad none of you got sick after that and were able to enjoy your vacation.. As for God, I've learned it seems His plan is never the same as mine.. and it's not always easy to accept but we do as best we can :)
    Blessings,
    Robyn

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  2. Lauren, from time to time I catch up on your posts, and I just am now getting to read this one. What a profound three hours you had! And what wisdom Dave had to tell you to talk to Jesus about it. Thanks for sharing!
    -Katrina-

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  3. I believe this post was one year to the day of Graham's first vomit episode, compliments of my adventurous snack options. Great start to our wonderful friendship!

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